The Taz Show, Bodyslams & Beyond
Guest: Mike Johnson
Release Date: Oct. 21, 2015
Report by Sean Sumey
– TYLER BREEZE IN WWE: Taz talks about the big debut on Smackdown and how he feels Prince Pretty will fit into WWE.
– HUMP DAY PROMOS: Who would make the best intern for the Taz Show? We get 13 entries to choose from.
– MIKE JOHNSON APPEARS: We can call off the search party. No harm has fallen on our PWInsider friend.
– LISTENER PHONE CALLS: Taz chats with his loyal listeners and values their opinions on the Hump Day Promos.
SUBJECTS COVERED (w/Time Stamps)
(00:29-01:06) Show intro
(01:07) Taz opens the show and is looking forward to Hump Day Promos. Today’s topic is “Why you should be a Taz Show intern.” Taz isn’t actually looking for an intern. At the Smackdown tapings last night, Tyler Breeze made his debut on the main roster. Taz thinks this is long overdue. Yesterday, Mike Johnson was supposed to be on the show but didn’t appear. Mike Johnson made contact with Taz yesterday after the show and will make an appearance today to make up for it. Back to Tyler Breeze, Taz would have preferred to see Breeze on Raw because there are more viewers. It is possible that WWE is trying to move more fans to Smackdown. If that is the case, Taz understands the move. Taz thinks Breeze will fit in nicely on the main roster. On NXT tonight, James Storm appears. This Sunday at Hell in a Cell, John Cena has his U.S. Open Challenge. Taz thinks it could be Tyler Breeze that accepts the challenge but he thinks it will probably be someone new. Taz is hoping for James Storm or Samoa Joe. With Breeze going to the main roster, Taz hopes that guys in NXT are chomping at the bit for the opportunity to step up and get more TV time. Taz really likes the Tyler Breeze gimmick. Even though the gimmick has been done before, Breeze really fits the character well.
(11:45) Taz takes a call from Chris in Alabama. Chris thinks it would be cool if someone from NXT answered the Cena Open Challenge, won the U.S. Title, and then took it back to NXT. That way, if someone from Raw wanted the title, they would have to go to NXT. Taz really likes the idea but doesn’t think WWE would do it. Taz thinks Chris is a future booker.
(14:30) Taz and Seth announce that Brian has left the show. Taz wishes him well and thanks him for all the work he did on the show.
(15:32) Mike Johnson is on the line. Taz clarifies that this isn’t the PWInsider Report. Mike apologizes for missing the show and admits that he slept through his alarm. Mike is also excited for Tyler Breeze to be on the main roster. Taz then asks Mike about Hulk Hogan’s restaurant closing. Taz heard that the restaurant shutting down doesn’t have anything to do with Hulk’s recent drama. Mike confirms and explains that Hulk had licensed his name to the restaurant and didn’t really have much to do with it. The owners are actually from Chicago and are rebranding their business so the closure was unrelated to Hulk or anything he is dealing with. Mike then talks about WWE signing a number of the Tough Enough competitors to contracts. As of date, seven of the Tough Enough cast members are signed to a contract. Taz mentions how people are hating on Tough Enough and saying it isn’t worth it because everyone ends up with a contract. Taz doesn’t agree and says that WWE has a good eye for talent.
Taz talks about running into Patrick from Tough Enough at a recent autograph signing. Taz was told back then that he had been signed by WWE, but Taz didn’t want to talk about it on his show. Taz warns the new talent to be patient and know your bounds. Patrick is only 19. Mike says WWE typically doesn’t bring people to the main roster until they are 21. Taz compares Patrick to Shane Douglas. Taz explains that Shane was always very passionate and often got heat because of the way he expressed his passion. Mike and Taz are both excited for the N.Y. Mets. Mike will be back for his weekly report next Tuesday.
(26:50) Taz announces that tomorrow night he will be doing a live fantasy draft edition of his show with Mike Tenay on Top Talkers. Taz runs through the process of doing a fantasy draft for listeners that might not be familiar with his former podcast.
(28:19-30:19) Taz does a live read for MeUndies.com. Go to MeUndies.com/TAZ for 20 PERCENT off your order.
(30:21) Taz takes a call from Frank in Georgia. Frank says LET’S GO METS! Frank is excited for Tyler Breeze on the main roster. Frank hopes WWE is building back up the Smackdown brand.
(32:14) Taz takes a call from John in Maryland. It is difficult to hear the beginning of the call because the music is playing over Taz’s conversation with John. John asks Taz if he could change one wrestler’s gimmick, who would it be and what would he change it to? Taz picks Kevin Owens. WWE is currently booking Owens as a bully. Taz would rather see him as a badass killing machine. Taz would like to see Owens presented like Taz or Steve Austin. John thinks Owens and Samoa Joe could have had a better feud if WWE would have allowed it.
(34:30) It’s time for Hump Day Promos. Promo #1 comes from Adrian Cotton. The promo starts out with a newscaster telling the listeners that earlier in the day they caught up with Eric Charles Wright who had a message for Taz. He is going to make sure that Taz has fresh coffee, his mail is sorted, and he has plenty of cigars. He will also take care of Brian and Seth for Taz. Taz liked it. Taz couldn’t remember if he was rating on stars or numbers. Seth reminds him it is a 10 scale. Taz gives this one a 7 and says that he likes his voice. Seth gives him an 8 because of the unique sound. Taz is confused why he has different names for his promo.
(38:29) Promo #2 comes from Alex16PV. Taz takes away a point because Alex didn’t give his name. Alex’s promo has background music. Alex refers to himself as Joey Zander. In the promo, he looks up the definition of an intern and reads it. Based on that, Alex (Joey Zander) feels he could be an intern for Taz. Taz liked it. Taz is glad he read the definition of an intern because it should give Seth an idea as to what he should be doing. Taz gives him an 8. Seth gives him a 9 because it was funny. Taz asks the entrants to include a name when they send in their promos.
(41:03) Promo #3 comes from Brian Shick. Brian said his name is Smart Mark. Taz yells at Seth for taking too long to stop the promos when he calls for it. Brian has the sniffles. Taz said if it lasts the whole promo, he is giving him a 4 because he doesn’t want to hear sniffling and sneezing. Taz said he sounds like he is sniffling from doing blow. Brian is giving his promo in the style of a nerd. In the middle of the promo, Brian yells to his “mom” that he isn’t hungry and he is trying to cut a promo. Brian can be a good intern and is good at making fun of people on Twitter. Brian wraps it up with another sniffle which causes Taz to lose it. Taz said Brian was at a 10 but the sniffle knocked it down to a 9. Taz understands the sniffle was part of the character and was sarcastic. Seth gives him an 8.5. Taz corrects Seth and says that only Taz is allowed to give half numbers or fractions. Seth must use whole numbers. Taz also decrees that Seth cannot award an Orange 13. Seth gives Brian a 9. Taz thinks Seth is crazy for scoring it the same as the previous promo. Taz asks Seth if he thinks any of the promos today will be Orange 13’s. Seth isn’t sure. A Twitter follower asks Taz how he could give Smart Mark a 9. The Twitter follower accuses Taz of doing blow. Taz challenges the Twitter follower to call in and say it to his face!
(47:45) Promo #4 comes from Brother Leroy a/k/a DST – Dirty South Texas. Brother Leroy is talking in a Gospel Preacher voice. Taz laughs and says that DST always tries to outdo himself with different characters and voices. Taz can’t give it a 10. Taz liked the promo. but worries that he is scoring on emotion rather than content. Taz gives him an 8.5. Seth gives him a 9 because the promo reminded him of Coming to America. Seth plays a clip from the movie so Taz knows what he is talking about.
(53:06) Promo #5 comes from Dylan Canter. Dylan wants Taz to imagine a day with no streaming problems, a day with no phone problems, and being able to talk about Raw without having an intern who fell asleep during the second hour. Taz thought Dylan was making fun of his show. Taz picks on Seth for knowing every little thing that Brian said but doesn’t listen to what Taz says. They continue Dylan’s promo. Dylan wants to know if Seth sent his poor wife to work while he sat at home on maternity leave. Dylan tells Taz not to worry about Mike Johnson, Mike Tenay, and Jim Ross because he has them all tied up in the next room and ready to appear in person on the show. Dylan says that compared to him, everyone else is just another intern. Taz thinks Dylan is crazy for kidnapping all of his guests. Taz liked how Dylan called out Seth and Brian for not being good at their jobs. Taz gives him an 8. Seth also gives him an 8 and thinks Dylan’s intensity reminded him of Taz. Taz took offense to being compared to Dylan Canter.
(58:20) Promo #6 comes from Fish Man. Fish Man is ready to disinfect the studio and do whatever needs done. Taz says that Fish Man always brings his A game. Taz said that Fish Man is more active on Twitter than he is. Taz likes the content of Fish Man’s promo. Taz said he can’t knock Fish Man for always sounding the same because a lot of people say Taz always sounded the same. Taz gives him a 9. Seth gives him a 7 because he feels all of Fish Man’s promos sound the same.
(1:05:17) Promo #7 comes from J-Fred the JOAT (Jack of All Trades). JOAT is the multi-tasker for the masses. JOAT is the ratings rising, early morning grinding, intern with a pro wrestling degree. Taz thought it was awesome. Taz didn’t like the sound of a paper being moved and thought it was JOAT reading his promo. Seth explained that JOAT sent in a video and the paper was when JOAT was showing his Pro Wrestling degree. Taz likes how everyone keeps mentioning the technical issues on the show. Taz gives him an 8. Seth gives him an 8 as well.
(1:08:02) Promo #8 comes from Laser Jabroni (Skinny Lad). Taz mentions how Kevin Cross won week one before Taz found our that he was an actual professional wrestler. Skinny Lad won last week and Taz found out he is a voice actor. Taz doesn’t know if he can allow it but will listen to the promo anyway.
(1:08:33) Taz takes a call from Jared in Australia. Jared was the guy who sent Taz a tweet and wants to know why Taz took a shot at him. Jared doesn’t like Shick’s promo. Jared is friends with Fish Man and likes his promos. Jared thinks that going forward, Skinny Lad should be excluded from these competitions.
(1:10:48) Back to Laser Jabroni. Laser is in a Razor Ramon character voice. There is music, sound effects, and more. Taz really likes it, but doesn’t know if he can allow it. Taz gives him a 9.5 and understands that people won’t like it. Seth gives him a 9.
(1:14:19) Promo #9 comes from FTLT Intern Matt Towsend. FTLT – First Time Long Time. This is in reference to the “first time caller, long time listener” line that Taz HATES. FTLT has two pots of coffee hot and ready for Taz. He has plenty of schnibbitz for Taz’s fernum. FTLT works for free. Taz says he hit everything. Taz explains why he hates first time long time. Taz gives him the Orange 13. Seth gives him a 10.
(1:18:09) Promo #10 comes from Nadir Tabata. Nadir is rapping. I’m assuming it is about being an intern. Nadir added music to his rap after Taz suggested it last time. Taz gives him a 10…for now. The music underneath the promo is Samoa Joe’s NXT theme. Taz listens to the promo a second time. Taz said the ending was weak. Seth gives him a 10. A Twitter follower writes in to Taz to say that the 10 for Nadir is more fitting than an Orange 13 because the music was too loud and it is hard to hear what Nadir is saying. Another one, says Nadir’s promo was the best one they have ever played. Someone else suggests an explosion sound at the end of Nadir’s promo.
(1:24:38) Promo #11 comes from Noah Howell. Noah is no longer a janitor and is now an intern. Noah is going to rip Seth limb from limb. Noah’s promo is about as short as Taz’s run as a wrestler in WWE. Taz said that insulting the host is not a good way to win the contest. Taz gives him a 7 for trying to sound tough. Taz believes Noah was trying to pretend to be a tough guy. Seth gives him a 7 as well. Taz acknowledges that his WWE run wasn’t as long as he would have liked but ended due to injury.
(1:29:40) Taz takes a call from Rocky in North Carolina. Rocky likes this batch of promos better than last week. Rocky gives his top three from this week. Rocky likes that Fish Man has a catch phrase. Taz likes the hashtag #TazManiax.
(1:34:10) Promo #12 comes from the Real Heel. Real Heel refers to the Taz Show as a podcast. This doesn’t make Taz happy. Real Heel also directs his insults toward other contestants and Seth. Taz feels that Real Heel didn’t stay on topic. Taz gives him a 5. Taz thinks that if someone gets below a 6, they should be banned for life. Seth thinks it should be like the Soup Nazi where they are banned for one year. Taz blames Seth for choosing a promo that wasn’t on point. Seth gives him a 6.
(1:39:17) Promo #13 comes from Preston McButtons. Preston says CBS contacted him because Seth is on maternity leave and Brian is no good. Preston doesn’t need 45 seconds, he only needs 44. Taz gives him an Orange 13. Taz loved it. Taz enjoyed his voice and tone. Taz also liked how he told a story. Taz compared him to Yosemite Sam. Seth makes reference to the Tazmanian Devil. This almost puts Taz over the edge. Taz said he doesn’t like being compared to a cartoon character. Seth gives him a 10. Seth asks if an Orange 13 wins a free spot on the Taz Cruise. Taz said his cruise would be in New York harbor. A Twitter follower asks if Preston is really Jaime Noble. Taz was always a fan of Noble’s promos. Taz is giving out two t-shirts today. Today’s winners are FTLT Intern and Preston McButtons.
(1:49:07) Taz begins the close of the show by hyping NXT. Taz mentions the Royals defeating the Blue Jays and the Mets taking on the Cubs. Taz thinks the Mets will sweep the Cubs. (He was correct.) Taz does feel that baseball is a work and the Mets may lose tonight. Taz wants to know why people don’t trim the ivy at Wrigley Field. Tomorrow will be the first live edition of the Fantasy Draft with Mike Tenay.
RATE & REVIEW
7 out of 10. I always enjoy these Hump Day Promos. When Taz first mentioned the concept, I wasn’t sure how it would be. Then, I wasn’t sure how I felt about a lot of the same people sending in entries each week. I now have grown accustomed to both and I must say that I am a fan. I like how the rivalries are developing and the entrants make call backs to prior promos and phone calls. It makes you feel like you are in a club or some gang. This was an entertaining show and I look forward to next week’s batch of promos. Taz didn’t announce what the topic will be so I guess we just have to be patient.